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If this is a just universe, there has to exist some string of expletives that describes how I feel about driving in NJ.

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Ahh, certainly on the right track. It reminded me of the short story "The Nine Billion Names of God" - except with profanity instead of God's appelations.
I've found that leaving carefully spaced pauses between unmodified curses tends to maximize their impact.

Real Life Example:
(after erasing my XP total before typing it into my calculator for adding)
fuck (1 second full stop) shit (1 second full stop) cock (1 second full stop) ass
I used that shortly after realizing that my 'corrected' Google Maps directions sent me to an interstate that wasn't there, leaving me to swear while trying to find a Michigan Left to turn around on (frickin' thing diverged into a residential area for .2 miles before getting around to the U-turn).
If this was a just universe, nobody would have to drive in NJ.
If this were a just universe, there would be no NJ.
Does it count as irony that I agree, yet was born there?

... Assuming I'm not going to be a super villian, that is.